Courtesy of: Dot & Crying Game
TRAIL
Corrales, too crazy for boys’ town, too much of a boy for crazy town. It’s also where trail was. Hounds gathered at the Wagner Farms parking lot. If they were bored or thirsty, there was a prelube across the road at Ex Novo. Reports indicate some folks went hard.
Trail eventually got to Ella Drive at the Sandoval Lateral. There was a beer check or two before then but I missed it. Easy 2 Please was tired of me coming early so I showed up an hour late. Showed her! I caught up with the walkers and solved checks heading northeast on Price, zigging and zagging across the ditch. The pack passed a curious mark, a K with a circle inside. This was later revealed to be a kissing check, as the hares wanted the pack to enjoy running trail as much as they did laying it.
People who know how to follow dollops of flour on the ground found their way into the orchard to hang out with the FRBs, hares, and assorted jackasses. Some of the lazier walks opted instead to high tail back to the start instead of hanging out where the beer was free and the songs were dirty. The hares jumped in the truck and goaded the rest of the herd back to circle.
CIRCLE
I forgot to take notes! Virgin Just Jennifer was an absolute champ, dampening her whole blouse but proudly drinking her down down completely with fully erect arm. Circle was pretty manageable, but a few too many hats for some people. Autowankers somehow drank NOT to the El Camino song. It was a little complicated at the end of circle, when RA Bone Breath couldn’t precisely remember the ABQ song. Fortunately Calculanus was happy to improvise with something and something and something and something. Hey, it does rhyme! We’d learn our lesson later after briefly but dramatically misplacing her koozy. Minor magical moment: after circle there was a unified, unplanned mass piss check. Gonna be some sour apples in that orchard come summer.
A NEW SONG?
Welcome to my bunghole, won’t you come inside
I’ve got everything you want, spread my ass cheeks wide
Let’s get things nice and lubed, as you start rimming me
When you stick your tongue inside it fills me with such glee
In my bunghole, welcome to my bunghole
Watch it bring me to my sh-n-n-n-n-knees knees
Ohhh you’re gonna make me scream
Welcome to my bunghole, thanks for the foreplay
Penetrate me deep inside, we haven’t got all day
While you drill me from behind, feel my spincter squeeze
I think this could start to hurt, don’t forget my safeword please
In my bunghole, welcome to my bunghole
I wanna feel your serpentine-tine-tine
Oh you’re gonna make me scream
Welcome to my bunghole, it gets looser everyday
You say fucking me now is like throwing a hot dog down a hallway
I lost my old butt plug, it just fell right out
Gonna have to get a new one now before I start to spout
Out my bunghole, spraying our my bunghole
D-d-d-d-d-d down down my jeans, jeans, jeans
I gotta get these cleaned
You know where you are? You’re in my bunghole baby
So drink it doooooooown, down down down down
THIS WEEK IN HASHTORY
· 1945 – Geneva Convention disallows Malort from wartime use
· 1968 – Founding of Matola Mozambique H3
· 2010 – Crying Game starts complaining about beer quality on trail, hasn’t stopped yet
On on, me droogies,
-W’s V